Battle Royale

Came face-to-face with a psychotic giant cockroach moments ago. I first knew of its presence when it crashed into my living room wall. I took notice and saw how huge it was. I stealthily made my way to grab a newspaper and the insecticide. With both objects in each hand, I eyeballed my foe... waiting for the perfect time to strike. It sensed my presence and decided to strike first. It charged at me like a bull rushing towards the Matador and I swatted it in mid-air with my newspaper. It vanished from my line of sight for awhile. I soon spotted it on the ground. I crouched low... deciding my next move. I decided to use the 2nd weapon at my disposal. I switched off the living room fan as I did not want to poison myself with the spray of the insecticide can. I sent the first burst of insecticide at it. It did not react. I sent a few more sprays and it finally started to stagger around before flipping on its back. Victorious... I left it alone to die a glorious death.